Saturday, August 15, 2020

Gone Like a Cat Outta Hell

Today is Saturday and it's 114 degrees outside and I really want to be kicking back in my Clampett Oasis right now.

Instead, I'm ready to go on a trip that I'm not sure is happening (and by ready, I mean mindset, not packed), wondering whose yard the cat that rejected me is in, and pondering if men over 50 find hairy legs attractive these days.

Maybe I should start at the beginning.

When I last left you, I mentioned an injured stray kitty (who I've named Pretty Boy because he's so pretty I thought he was a girl and yes that's a politically incorrect thing to say, but lighten up, he's a cat.) which I found in my brother's yard last Friday.

If you remember, I discovered I could bring him in to our local Animal Foundation and they would treat him if he wasn't too badly injured and neuter him and release him back where he was found.

Tuesday morning, while he ate his wet food, I was able to grab him and put him in a cat carrier so I could get him down to the Foundation. He was not happy.

Complication - on Monday when I got in my truck to go to two back-to-back doctor appointments, my battery was dead. I had to borrow my sister-in-law's car to get to my appointments. 

So for Operation Kitty Rescue on Tuesday, I had to rely on my sister to come and take me and kitty to the Animal Foundation, then go back to my brother's and arrange for my truck to be towed to the shop near my sister's house (after having my brother help me unsuccessfully try to jump start it).

I can't believe I've become the needy problem child in my family.

Anyway, so I hung out at my sister's house for the day while I waited for news on both my truck and the kitty.

I called the Animal Foundation late in the day to check on Pretty Boy, and was over the moon when they said he had a cut on his paw that was infected and that's why his leg was swollen! He had some other cuts and abscesses but he was going to be fine and I could pick him up on Friday.

I was so happy that kitty was okay, I can't even tell you. He became my mission and right now I just really need to feel like I rescued a lost soul and made his life a little better.

Pretty Boy was indifferent to my kindhearted mission.

I picked him up from the foundation and talked to him through the holes in his carrier the entire drive home. I only got thumps by way of reply, as he tried to escape his cardboard cage. He clearly was mad and not speaking to me but I was not discouraged. I just knew as soon as I got him back to his comfy little shed home, he would realize his wounds were healed, his life was better, and we would be buds.

When we arrived home, I opened his carrier in the shed and tipped it a little so he could climb out. He sniffed at his bowl of dry food and water, then climbed back into his hiding place at the back of the shed. I figured I'd leave him be and check on him later.

When I went out a couple hours later, he was gone. I checked about every hour till about 9:00 PM Friday night and several times today and there still is no sign of him. He took off like a cat outta hell.

(By the way, I did not have my camera at the ready to get a picture of Pretty Boy and that picture at the top of my blog is a stunt double.)

My idealistic mission of giving Pretty Boy a better life is in the toilet and I've been depressed since last night. I've been rejected by a stray cat that had no where else to go.

But what did I expect? Why would he want to stay at the place where some gray-haired lady overfed him to earn his trust, tricked him into confinement, then had his balls snipped? 

It's like me and my ex all over again. Figuratively speaking.

Side question - Now that I have two ex's, do I need to specify which one I'm talking about? Like Ex1 and Ex2? I think not, since I don't really talk about Ex1 much. Ok, good. Glad we worked that out.

Then today, a lady from the Animal Foundation called me and said the kitty was not supposed to be released to me yet! He had an infection that required a different antibiotic they had to administer and he was supposed to stay there for another 2 to 3 days!

Perfect. So not only did I lose the cat released to my care, but he may get sicker because now he won't get the antibiotics he needs. It's not my fault they released him by mistake...but still. I feel like I failed Pretty Boy.

The lady from the Foundation actually drove to my house to give me the medication to put in his food in case he shows up. Preferably, she wants me to try to catch him and get him into a carrier again and she will come out and pick him up. Then they can monitor him for a few more days.

Pretty Boy is going to hate me. 

I shall update you with any new developments in this story.

Remember way back at the beginning of this post I said I was ready to go on a trip I didn't know if I was taking? My sister and I were planning on visiting my mom in California this weekend, but only if my sister has Sunday, Monday and Tuesday off. She would not know her schedule until today and if she had those days off, we were going to pack like maniacs and get out of town when she got off work later.

Turns out, she did get those days off, but we can't go because I'm now on Pretty Boy watch.

No good deed goes unpunished.

Aside from being rejected by my husband and a stray cat, the last pathetic thing happening in my life is my sister is going to be working a side gig where she can use her aesthetician license and do facials and waxings part time and said she wants to practice on me. 

I thought, free facials and eyebrow shaping? Just in time for my profile picture - sign me up! 

Then she tells me I need to grow out my bikini line and leg hair because it needs to be like an inch long or something in order for her to wax it.

Seriously?? Can my battered self-esteem just get one freaking break?? 

So no anytime soon for me unless I find an over 50 guy who digs hairy chicks. And they are probably out there. And no, I would not want to date them.

(I am kidding about joining, by the way. It is the last thing on this earth I want to do right now. Besides looking for a cat when it's 114 outside.)

Oh, but I did get my car battery replaced for free, so that is one good thing that happened in all of this. So I should count my blessings.

Pathetic Cat Loser (see what I did there?)

In case you missed these:
Going Through It
The Day My Dog Made Enemies of Pretty Much Everyone
My Life Imploded But I Got Some Free Makeup


Abby said...

Whew, what a roller coaster! I hope Pretty Boy comes around again since he knows you're a source of food.

Busy Bee Suz said...

That was quite a ride that you took us on. I really wish it had a happier ending...with Pretty boy getting better, you visiting your Mom and you not being a hairy woman in heat of the summer. Yikes.

Cats are funny. And they can be real assholes too. I have a feeling he might come back looking for some food.

Keep your chin (hairs!) up and hopefully things will get better.

Lori said...

Abby - I hope so, but I recently found out he actually hadn't been neutered either, so I think it will take another injury to keep that trampin' cat down.

Lori said...

Suz - Chin hairs - hahaha!